Have you ever had a loss for words? Over the past almost seven years, I have learned that sometimes… there just are no words and that silence is a practice. I was reminded of this last week as I was reading through the book of Job.
If you’re unfamiliar with Job’s story, let me give you a quick summary: Job was a wealthy man, who some would argue “had it all.” Satan approached God and asked Him if he could test Job, arguing that he only loved God because he was blessed. God didn’t doubt Job and permitted it, with the exception that Satan could not kill him. With that, Satan did his thing: He took his family away, his possessions, livestock, land, and even tested the man physically. Job’s wife questioned him and urged him to turn his back on God, but he didn’t. Then, Job had three friends who showed up amidst his grief.
The Scripture reads, “Then they sat on the ground with him seven days and nights, but no one spoke a word to him because they saw that his suffering was very intense” (Job 2:13). I’ve read this book many times, but I’ve never picked up on this line before. It’s proof though that sometimes there really are no words, and that’s OK.
However, in subsequent chapters, we see Job’s friends, one-by-one, break their silence and offer “helpful” advice. As readers, we can see that their advice, though some of it was true, wasn’t very helpful.
When Carson died, so many people wanted to help us feel better. They offered kind words and also well-meaning encouragement, but sometimes, just like in Job’s story, there just are no words but presence is a gift.
I once read that suffering is one of the most intimate ways to know Christ. But true suffering cannot be comforted by human hearts and hands. Instead, offering presence throughout someone's grief, like Job’s friends initially did, is a gift. Holding someone who is suffering in prayer is a gift. Reaching out, not to offer advice or to try to help them feel better, but instead to remain near and offer presence, is a gift.
In Job 12:5, he tells his friend Zophar, “The one who is at ease holds calamity in contempt and thinks it is prepared for those whose feet are slipping.” In other words, he's saying we can’t understand what we haven’t experienced.
Friends, as believers in Christ, we are called to walk alongside each other through life’s ups and downs. However, we also know that only God can bring peace and comfort in true suffering. As we enter into a new year, let’s focus on showing up and loving our people well, silently, giving God space to work in ways we cannot.
Have a great week!
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